Esme's Story Part One
by Shadow Kissed134
Summary: A new version of Esme's Story about how she loses her baby and a bit of a twist
1. Chapter 1

I know this is totally different from the story and that alice isn't esme's daughter but you know what i just thought it would be a great idea so i wrote it down. DISCLAIMER; all these characters rightfully belong to Stephanie Meyer and not me (except for jonathon that one was mine) :) and i hope you enjoy! please review it i want 5 reviews so i can make a part 2.

Esme's Story – Part 1

Sitting in the waiting room, my arms folded around my expectant belly. _He_ should be here. I look around at all the happy couples here in the pregnancy wards, joyful and so in love. Kisses on cheeks, hands on their swollen stomachs, talk of sweet nothings, I miss it. '_At least you still have the baby'_ I thought to myself.

"Next, please." Came a gentle voice.

A man in his late 20's or very early 30's stepped out of the doctor's office. He was very handsome; possibly the handsomest man I'd ever seen. He was tall – about six foot or so, gloriously fair hair, golden-butterscotch eyes and was of a very pale complexion. My eyes feasted upon him.

"Yes, that's me." I said, standing carefully up so I wouldn't jostle my precious cargo. I walked as calmly as I could towards the man; my heart was pounding in my chest as if I was thirteen again with my very first crush. As I neared the man, I noticed the things I hadn't at the far end of the waiting room; the kind way his mouth settled into a smile, and the way his eyes radiated a peace – which I guess came from the job of saving people's lives here. My heart fluttered as he gave me a flash of his pearly, white teeth. He held out a pale hand to me,

"Hello, I'm Carlisle. Carlisle Cullen, and I'll be your doctor today and you are..?"

"Esme Brandon." I took his hand. I gasped, his hands were ice-cold and it was mid-July here! Carlisle seemed to notice my shock at the temperature of his hand and stuck it awkwardly, away in his trouser pocket.

"Please, step this way, Esme." He said, holding the door open for me.

"Thank you." I stepped inside and sat on the customary chair. Carlisle closed the door and went over to his mahogany desk and opened up my file.

"So Esme, I'm just going to go through a few things on your file, okay?"

I nodded, folding my arms around my stomach, preparing for the questions that always followed. I watched him as he read the 'Personal History' and watched as his eyebrows furrowed. He found it.

He cleared his throat, "It uh, says here that you have a daughter called Mary Alice, and from what I have here she is fifteen?"

The familiar lump grew in my throat, it's idiotic honestly, the amount of times I've had to answer that question and I _still_ end up crying my heart out.

"Yes. Uh--" I sniffled, "She isn't with us anymore, a couple of months ago, she went missing, and--". Just talking about it relived it for me. I recall the last time I saw my Alice; she was going out the front door to go to school…

_Her long, inky black hair- she got that from her father- was swishing side to side as she was waving goodbye to me. She was smiling from ear to ear, but even though she was smiling, I noticed the dark circles under her eyes from the night before__. My Alice was always special, even more so now because she had started getting visions of the future. But it didn't change one bit on how I cared for her, except I worried that she would see something she'd be better off not seeing. She even saw the baby coming before we had actually decided on it. Her father, Jonathon, didn't like it when she did though. He clenched his jaw and his fists while she saw it and then yelled at her afterwards. I had heard countless arguments between her and him. She just wanted him to accept her for who she was. He wanted her to be a normal girl. I loved Jonathon, truly I did, with all my heart, but if he was going to keep on treating my children like that; I was going to leave him and go and live with my parents. My children deserved better than that. As I had told him so the night before she disappeared. That morning, before Jon had left for work, he promised that it would never happen again, and after that, I never saw her again. That's what I assumed he meant by 'it never happening again'. All he had to do was get rid of her and it wouldn't. And then I saw the obituary he had placed in the newspaper for her. And right then I knew right down to the marrow of my bones that I wasn't safe here (if he had already gotten rid of my Alice how soon before it was me?) and neither was my baby. So I left him and went back to Chicago to my parents._

Carlisle, obviously sensing my distress, quickly walked over to me, and he put his arms around me and just held me. That was all I needed. Just to be held; I hadn't been held in too long a time. A few minutes passed and then he drew away – reluctantly- and he looked me in the eyes and quietly said, "Don't do this to yourself."

I stared back at his eyes and saw something different about them, they were darker not golden anymore- but dull butterscotch and they looked…hungry. As I had been contemplating this we both had been, unconsciously, moving towards each other. His beautiful face, just inches away from mine, it was hard to resist it – and I started to close the space between us. And then, he must have realized we were in a not-so-much a _professional_ position, and pulled away. He blinked a couple of times to try and shake the connection that was so strong a few moments before. He cleared his throat again, "Okay, um, let's take a look at that belly of yours." And he went back to his desk and opened a drawer and got out a measuring ribbon. I pulled the loose fabrics of my dress back so he could get a clear range for measuring. He rolled out the ribbon and wrapped his arms around my stomach and reached around and brought the tape forward so he could see the measurement. This one single gesture just made my heart thump even harder; I could see it moving through the fabrics of my dress. His touch was ice cold, but it left me feeling even warmer than I had in a long time.

"Twenty-one inches. A very healthy baby." He assured me as he wrote it down on a little pink card and slipped it inside my file.

"And I'll see you on the due date; I'll be one of the delivering doctors." He offered me a hand to help me up. I took it and grunted as the weight surprised me, as it always does.

"Thank you, Carlisle. I'll see you then." I said, gratefully.

And then as Carlisle kissed me on the fore-head, my water broke.


	2. Chapter 2

Esme's Story – Part Two – The Baby

Bright flickering lights. Pain. Nothing but pain, sweat and the image of a blonde angel. He was coming. The baby was coming. _Push,_ the angel said, _Push._ I could barely hear him over the sound of my hysterical shrieks. But I did, I gave it everything I had to try and get my baby out. And then, after what seemed forever; a tiny wailing joined mine. I stopped shrieking, gasping in huge breaths I asked for my baby.

"Give him to me, give my baby to me."

Suddenly the wailing stopped; there was silence except for my heavy breathing. I knew in my gut that something was wrong.

"Give him to me. Why won't you give him to me?" I demanded. Then I saw the doctors carrying him out of the delivery room.

"Where are they taking him? What's happened?" I asked the angel. The angel came to sit on my bed, he shifted uncomfortably.

"He didn't make it, Miss Esme. I'm sorry but, he didn't make it." whispered Carlisle.

"No. You're lying it can't be true! _Why won't you give me my baby?!"_ I shouted at him.

I peered over him trying to see what they were doing with my baby, they were laying him on a wooden bench and one of the doctors went out. The others were writing notes and looking at their watches. And then the doctor came back with a pure white sheet. _No_ _it can't be._ And then they placed on his body dragging it up over his face--. At that point I looked away, I couldn't watch anymore. I started sobbing hysterically. I clawed at my face and any other part of me I could get to. I wanted to punish myself for failing him.

"Stop!" Carlisle reached down and grabbed my wrists pulling them firmly away from me. This time I wasn't shocked at the coolness of his skin, it felt good.

"This isn't your fault understand? Esme, you are amazing. Okay?" he breathed in deeply, "Your ability to love; I've never seen anything like it, you are so _good_, why can't you see that?" Carlisle put both my hands in his left and brought his hand up to brush away a few sweaty strands of hair off my fore-head. This just made me sob even harder. The truth was I wasn't good; my Alice had gone missing _presumably_ dead and my baby absolutely and utterly dead. And what was I? I was going to become dead.

*********

When Carlisle finally left my side, I got out of the bed and opened the door of my room and stepped outside. Other people here in the maternity ward were all occupied and didn't notice the one single woman walking out. I walked out the entrance of the hospital and headed for the open road. I started walking. Until I found a sign that would direct me to the place I wanted to go.

_The Illinois Cliff_

_ 2 miles_

It was a long, hard trek but I relished every step of pain that served as my penance for failing my baby and my Alice. I made it to the cliff. I walked right up to the edge, ignoring the signs that said the same thing; _Danger: Cliff Edge._ The waves on were crashing on the shore 300 feet below me. A cool sea breeze rustled my hair. I put my toes over the edge and put my arms out; like they were my wings and I was going to take off. And I jumped. I felt free; with nothing below me and nothing above me, it was like flying, but in flying the birds go up instead of crashing down. As the ground came closer I braced myself for the impact and…_crunch._ I snapped in two and lay limply there awaiting death's embrace.


	3. Chapter 3

QUICK NOTE: This is not the end of the chapters, so keep reading and waiting, i'll finish asap.

Esme's Story – Part Three – Waking Up

He came quick, death. I felt his cool embrace almost as soon as I had met impact. Whispering.

_Why Esme? Why did you do this to yourself?_ That's odd. I'd always imagined that death would be happy I was in his arms. My eyelids fluttered in response to his questions and then I realised; it wasn't death, it was Carlisle that held me.

"Don't worry Esme, I won't let you die. You can trust me."

_How i__s he going to fix me?_ I wondered, _I'm broken beyond repair._

And then we were moving. We were moving fast. I could feel how forceful the wind was against my skin. But I didn't care; I was being held by Carlisle, and that was all that mattered to me now. The journey was short, and wherever it was where we arrived, Carlisle stepped inside. He lay me down on something soft and whispered in my ear; his breath tickling my scalp,

"I won't lie to you, Esme. What I'm about to do – it is going to be painful. And when you wake up, you'll be just like me. You'll see."

At the mention of me being just like him; my fingers tightened- just a little bit on his hand that held mine. I could hear him breathing in and out slowly, as if he was preparing himself for extremely hard work. And then he sunk his teeth into my neck and instantaneously I began to feel as if I were burning from the inside out. The flames greedily licked at every inch of my body; and I screamed. I screamed for Alice. I screamed for my baby. I screamed for me. And I screamed for Carlisle. And then I felt something cool meet my skin, it helped; only a little bit though- the fire was too great. To my amazement I could easily open my eyelids and I looked for the coolness that was trying to ease my pain. Again it was Carlisle. He had taken off his white shirt and rolled up his trousers, and was holding me. Knowing that it was _his_ cool caress that held me, it eased my suffering- just a little bit more.

**********

The fire began to slowly recede from my fingertips and my toes. It kept on receding until it was just burning my heart. _Ba boom, ba boom, ba boom, ba-boom-ba-boom-ba-boom, BA- BOOM…. _Andthen just silence_._ Carlisle must have heard my heart stutter and stop because he had gotten up from the bed and was standing beside me. My eyes opened. I could see everything. The crevices of the cracks in the wooden roof, the dust motes floating down; everything was beautiful and magnified. But when I turned to see Carlisle's face; it was like the sun had come out after a monsoon. If I had thought he was handsome before; it was nothing to what I saw now. I thought about getting up and embracing Carlisle-but I was already there. I gasped.

"It's alright, Esme." Smiled Carlisle, running his arms seductively up and down my back. Lust I'd never felt before over-took me. I lunged at him; tackling him to the ground, giggling. Following my lead; Carlisle slowly brought his mouth to mine and gently kissed me. At that, the lust in me was magnified a thousand times over, if that's possible. I couldn't hold it in- I kissed him furiously back. He broke off, gasping for air, "Esme, let's be rational."

"Okay," I answered, "Only after we've been irrational first."

**********

His trousers and my dress lay in a pile of shreds next to us. I could have never imagined loving somebody could be like this; with Jonathon it had always seemed like a chore, but now it blew my world.

"Good morning, Miss Esme." Chuckled Carlisle, looking at me and running his hand down my back. I shivered, but I wasn't cold. I realised – Carlisle didn't feel as cold as he used too. Actually, he felt warm.

"Good morning." I smiled.

He leant forward and kissed my forehead.

"There are some clothes over there in the cabinet." He pointed over to a plain wooden cabinet I hadn't noticed before. But, then again, I _was_ distracted.

"Why? I'm perfectly comfortable as I am." I said to him.

"I know, and I must say _I prefer you as you are,_ but it's important we blend in with the rest of humanity." He replied.

I took in a deep breath; noticing I could taste both him and the room – weird.

"What am I then? If I'm not human?" I asked him.

"You're a vampire."

Well, I had to admit it; Carlisle certainly didn't beat around the bush.


	4. Chapter 4

Esme's Story – Part Four – Meeting Edward

After Carlisle had pointed out that I needed to hunt – _it's so weird saying it like that_ – we both went out of the cabin he had taken me, and into the woods. He had given me some old clothes to put on for just the hunting because he said; _I might be a messy eater_. So there we were; running so unbelievably fast through the woods looking for a herd of deer. I laughed. And then Carlisle called out to me; "Stop". I skidded to a stop, to my intense amusement, and turned to look at him. He ran up to me and lowered himself in a crouching stance, gesturing for me to do so too. I lowered myself down to and he whispered to me;

"Put your hands down to the earth," he said, following his own instructions, "And you should sense them."

I put my hands down to the damp soil and focused completely on feeling anything. I felt a rabbit darting away in the bushes, and I felt the deer nibbling softly at the grass about 100 feet away, but then I felt something else. I felt a predator silently closing on the same deer we were seeking.

"Now do you sense them?" Carlisle asked me.

"Yes" I replied.

"Now, let everything out; give in to the thirst that you feel – become the animal and hunt them."

At those words I darted off, Carlisle following behind because I was stronger than him, he'd said. Running, my thirst bursting through every part of my being, my vision grew red as I focused on the kill. Sniffing as I ran I smelt the very-off herbal smell of the deer that Carlisle was heading towards, and the mouth watering scent of the cougar which was the predator I had felt before. We were in sight of the deer and the cougar in the tall grass; the deer saw us and began to run – with Carlisle following them. I was repulsed by the herbal scent of their blood and went instead after the cougar. The cougar had obviously sensed that was I a predator like itself; but not a rival, but stronger than itself and had turned to run off – but I was quick and had lunged at it. Leaping onto it's back; I'd startled it and it let out a fierce roar and tried to swipe me off with it's massive paws. I didn't feel it as the claws scraped my diamond-hard skin and sank my teeth easily into it's neck. The cougar continued to swipe feebly at me but then broke off and gurgled. The blood was hot running though my body and I enjoyed the warmth it spread. I drank and drank until I felt the beast die in my hands. Wiping my mouth on my hand, it dawned on me what I had just done; I had killed. My knees gave out as I pulled my hand toward my mouth as I gasped. I felt the strong urge to cry, but the tears wouldn't come. Maybe I can't cry. I stroked the dead animal with my bloody hand, feeling the loss of life. That's how Carlisle found me.

"Esme?"

He knelt down beside me.

"I don't like it either, sweetheart, but it's an easier sin to forgive than taking the life of a man. And besides they all eat meat off animals; why shouldn't we?" he said to me.

I nodded at his logic, but it still didn't make me feel any better about taking a life. Carlisle grabbed my hands and gently pulled me to me feet, and put his arm around my shoulder as we slowly walked back to the cabin.

"Esme?"

"Yes, Carlisle?"

"There's somebody you need to meet." He said very slowly as if afraid of what I might do once he had said it.

"Yes, and who might that be?'

He breathed in deep, "My son, Edward."

"He's not my sired son per say, as more of an adopted son. He's one of us. He was changed just a few years ago, in 1918. And I would like it very much if you met him, Esme."

**Author's Note**:** I have hit a mental block at the moment cannot think of anything else to add to this. Encourage me to have a brain spaz and finish this story by giving me ten reviews!**


	5. Chapter 4 EXTENDED

Esme's Story – Part 4 Extended

I was breathing in deeply and exhaling in a fruitless attempt to calm myself for meeting Carlisle's _son_, Edward.

"Don't worry, love. He'll love you." Said Carlisle, as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, "You can now come in Edward." He called out.

"Edward is special in his own way, he can read our minds, so don't be alarmed if he is a bit _perceptive._" Carlisle quickly whispered before the door opened.

A bronze-haired boy entered the room; he appeared to be seventeen or so but I knew he was much older. He had the same butter-scotch eyes Carlisle had – but not as beautiful in my opinion, he had a long bridged nose and his mouth was pulled up in a crooked smile as he held out a hand and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you, finally, Esme."

I took it and gently shook it, "The pleasure's all mine, Edward." I smiled back, I couldn't help it – his smile was infectious. He looked at Carlisle and winked at him, Carlisle chuckled softly.

"What is it?" I inquired about the silent conversation going on between them.

"Nothing. Nothing at all, love." Carlisle answered.

_15 year later_

Ever since Carlisle had welcomed me into his family, I was happier than I'd ever been before. Since I was changed, Rosalie and Emmet joined our family. Rosalie was like a daughter to me, and I hoped that she would be what I was to Carlisle to Edward. Edward was still as stubborn to remain the eternal bachelor though, and didn't respond to my and Carlisle's efforts to get them together. Then Emmett was brought to us. Rosalie found him and brought him to us; afraid she wouldn't be able to change him properly. She loved him dearly and he loved her as she deserved, after what Royce did to her. And I got my chance to be a mother again. It was good, but it still doesn't stop me from missing Alice. My little girl.

*********

A tiny knock came from the front door of our house in New Hampshire. I walked to the front door and to my absolute and utter shock there was my Alice. I gasped. Her hair was cut brutally short, there were shadows under her eyes that weren't there the last time I saw her and I worried about what could've caused them. Behind her was a quiet man. He had blonde hair in wild curls and had red eyes and was really tall. I ran and embraced her in a tight hug.

"Um, Hi. I didn't expect this welcome. What's your name?" she said.

The horror grasped me, threatening to choke me, "You don't remember me?"

"No," she shook her head, "Should I?"

My Alice didn't remember me. My Alice. I choked down the sobs which were steadily rising up my throat.

"No don't worry about it sweetie. Who is this here?" I asked her.

"Oh how silly of me. This is Jasper Whitlock," she gestured to him.

"It's very nice to meet you ma'am." Jasper said with a southern accent.

"And I'm Alice."

"Come on in," I gestured for them to enter.

They did with a certain amount of grace; it was as if they were dancing across the threshold of the house.

"You've got a lovely house, ma'am." Jasper said very conventionally.

"Why thank you, Jasper. And it's Esme by the way."

"Yes ma'- I mean Esme."

Alice linked her hand in Jasper's.

"Esme?" Alice started.

"Yes, sweetie?" I replied.

"I can see the future, and that's how I met Jasper here, and that's how I saw you – I saw all of us as a family. And I was wondering..."

"Did you want to stay with us?' I asked her.

"Well, yes." She said straightening her coat.

I smiled; I've got my Alice back. She may not remember me but we've got time.

"Of course you can."

She ran up and hugged me, "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Jasper smiled at her exuberance, "Yes thank you, ma'- Esme."

"I've got a guest room for you Jasper," he said 'thank you' again, "And Alice you can have Edward's room for now- we'll have a room up for you in no time."

She grinned at me and ran up to Edward's room and started to put his stuff down stairs in the garage.

*********

Jasper, Alice and I were all waiting downstairs for the other's to return from the hunt. The door was opened by Carlisle, followed by Rosalie, and then Emmett and Edward bragging about the kills they had 'bagged'.

"Who are you?" Rosalie demanded as soon as she saw Alice and Jasper.

I stood up and introduced Alice and Jasper. Despite Rose's rudeness Alice and Rose both paired up and went away talking and giggling. Emmett just walked up to Jasper and punched him in the arm and said, "Welcome to the family, brother."

Jasper just smiled and pulled his arm in such a quick manoeuvre I didn't know what he did until Emmett fell to the floor.

"Bring on the competition." Jasper chuckled.

"Rematch!" Emmett cried, running out the door into the vast fields we had at the edge of town. Jasper laughed and followed after.

"Edward, honey?"

"Yes, Esme?" he said.

"Alice has… taken your room for a while… but we will get you a room built in no time." I said to him, "For now you'll be in the garage."

He shook his smiling, "I'm going to have a word with Alice. Excuse me." He said as he walked away. I listened as he ventured upstairs to Rose's room where the girl's were based. I laughed because as soon as the girls saw him they chucked some pillows at him, squealing 'Girls only.' The pillow fight raged until Edward accepted defeat and grumbled all the way to the garage. I then turned to Carlisle.

"Carlisle," I whispered.

"Yes?" he stepped closer to embrace me.

"That's her. That's my Alice! She's come home, finally. But – she doesn't remember me." I spoke; my voice was muffled by his shoulder. I felt the strong urge to cry again but I knew the tears would never come. Carlisle stroked my hair and held my face with both hands and looked me in the eyes before saying, "Don't worry, love. We have _nothing _but time to tell her. It'll work out. Trust me, love."

"But what if she hates me? She told me while we were waiting for you guys, that she was put into an asylum by her parents. She won't listen – even if I tell her that I had nothing to do with it, she won't believe me." My voice broke.

"Well, sweetheart, you'll have to tell her the truth sooner or later – she deserves that much. And you never know – she may listen to you _and_ believe you. You may be able to have your _true_ family again." Carlisle said to me.

"Okay, I'll tell her." I breathed in deeply and exhaled, "But not right now. It's just too much --"

Carlisle silenced me with a finger on my lips. And he bent down and gently kissed my lips.

"Don't worry, we have forever."

~THE END~

**Author's Note: And that's it for Esme's story, thank you for taking the time to read this, it means a lot to me. Thank you to everyone who added this to favourites or subscribed. Thank you. If you want to read more, I'm thinking of doing Alice's reaction to Esme telling her the truth, I don't know, but if you want to read it - just send me an email and I'll write it for you guys. Thank you **** xox**


End file.
